Today

Think I'llsa be updatin more. Not because my viewers wanna see it but because I am in a writing mood. Yup. I was looking on Buzznet and I started to notice so many of the peeps here are emo. (Not that I have enathin against emo people, they're cool.) I wonder if they have a good friend? A good friend it seems can make the whole difference. A lover can help somewhat, I won't deny that, it just seems with them you have this need to impress and act like you're happy so they don't feel incompetent. Maybe thats the problem with teenage relationships; maybe thats why the don't last. Maybe it is corrupted by society's need to create an inpenetrable facade of happiness found in some idea of perfection that no one can honestly hold up. Its just harder being young, you still have hope that you can be yourself and find acceptance and love. As we get older we'll just have to face up to this. You have two choices-- accept this or give up....I know my decision. I'm just waiting for the right time that results in the most benefits for me. I'm selfish, I know.
Whoa, I can sure as hell rant. Lol. Enaways. Emo kids...completely lost my train of thought...oh yeah!! Friendships. Those kids need a friend. I was never really emo. Just a suicidal, masochistic, self- destructive, wanna be whore. But I got saved. Not by Jesus..not god...and for goodness sakes not satan or enathin like that. Der schwarze schmetterling. He knows me. He's felt everythin I've felt. He knows and he dictates it so well.